SWEETsuicideLOVES
Sunday, May 8, 2011
;
12:00 PM
you obviously dont know how sorry i am ....
i really am and i want you to know i don't want you to hate me!!!
DCWK
its the beginning og something new.
;
11:56 AM
:(
its the beginning og something new.
;
11:24 AM
i couldn't think of anything nor anywhere, but here.
could just ignore this part, cause all i will be saying is about things which happened recently which kept me breathless.
all i could say was what happened four years ago, is happening right now.
i really feel like shit, i really dont know what to do.
i'm becoming a person whom i totally can't recognize.
i'm taking him for granted , only spare thought for myself and not him.
only now that he left, i realise. but i could no longer get him back to me .
things is already too late.
i really love him a lot he's the second guy.
if i wasN'T THAT STUBBORN, if i didn't say things out of anger, if i didn't do things to spark him, none of this would happened.
it's all my fault.
i shouldnt have joke with words i shouldnt have.
i shouldnt have gotten jealous over him and his sis when i know they are just friends.
i shouldnt have said that he doesnt care when i know he do.
there's just so many things happening, what friends say i just listen and forget about sparing a thought for him.
this happened 4 years ago because i listen to salt too much den believing him.
now listening to salt and got screw up again.
i really did say something i shouldn't have said that i think really hurt him.
i shouldn't have said he control me too much.
actually i don't mind people restrict me and all.
but after club and the new batch of friends make me feel wow wouldn't it be great that way.
but i guess i'm wrong.
not everyone will enjoy that type of relationship, it's too fake to be real.
and i don like it at all. i really wan him to be like how he used to be.
the past i used to tell vinegar and salt that club isn't good but now look i fall into that trap just because i don't wan to be left out.
i really dunno why i would turn into a club, drinking, smoking monster.
change in less den 6 months.
it hurts me a lot when he doubt me , the words he say are as hurtful as the onces 4 years back.
after wk that lie i haven't been lying since den, but why does he always treat things in a way like i had lied.?
what have i done to make him doubt me so much.
i admit i didn't wan to show that i love him because i was afraid of getting hurt again..
i really regretted.
i wish he would care like how he used to.
i wish he would love me like how he used to.
cause i'm starting to miss him right now.
and i'm starting to be afraid of losing him.
its the beginning og something new.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
;
10:52 AM
a lot of things happening ,
but i'm still breathing.
thanks clynston and everyone that really helped and be there, really appreciated .
well nothing much for me to say for the past few days, have been busy work....
its the beginning og something new.